Friday, February 27, 2009

FGM, life, frustrations and more...

A few days ago i was reading a sisters blog about an arabic cultural practice in which a woman waits 40 days after giving birth to shower. Not only is this UNislamic, this is actually a christian practice, where the woman was seen as being impure after having a baby, especially a girl, and had to wait 40 days to shower and become pure again.

"A traditional Christian festival that commemorates the ritual purification of Mary 40 days after the birth of her son. It also marks the presentation of the infant Jesus in the temple. Christians were observing this holiday in Jerusalem as early as the 4th Century A.D. According to a Jewish tradition, women were considered unclean after the birth of a child and were not permitted to enter the Temple to worship until purified. This purification was done 40 days after the birth of a son and 60 days after the birth of a daughter. At the end of the 40 or 60 days, the mother was brought to the Temple or synagogue and ritually purified, allowing her to go to religious services again, and generally go out in public. Candlemas is celebrated on or around Groundhog's day. The holiday also has pagan roots."

Its sad that muslims incorporate rituals from other religions or pagans and follow them blindly. FGM (female genital mutilation) is popular in a lot of islamic/muslim countries, especially in uneducated areas where muslims mutilate a womans anatomy so that they can guarantee she will be a virgin when she marries. Anything that causes harm to a person or their body is haram. FGM causes urinary tract infections, infertility, bleeding and even death.

"Female Genital Mutilation (FGM) is a destructive, invasive procedure that is usually performed on girls before puberty. Part or all of the clitoris is surgically removed. This leaves them with reduced or no sexual feeling. Orgasms are sometimes impossible to experience later in life. Many health problems result from the surgery.
FGM originated in Africa. It was, and remains, a cultural, not a religious practice.
Among individuals and groups opposed to the mutilation, it is seen as a method of reducing the sexual response of women in order to make them less likely to become sexually active before marriage or to seek an extra-marital affair after marriage. "

"This mutilating operation is often associated mainly with the religion of Islam. This is incorrect. FGM is primarily a social practice, not a religious one. Female genital mutilation predated Islam. It originated in Africa and remains today a mainly African cultural practice. Some indicators of this are:
It is widely practiced in countries where the predominant religion is Christianity: Examples are Ethiopia and Kenya. In multi-faith countries, it is often forced on girls whose families follow all faiths: Animism religions, Christianity, and Islam. For example, it is frequently practiced among both Muslims, Christians and Animists in Ethiopia, Eritrea, Sierra Leone, and Sudan.

FGM was once practiced by Ethiopian Jews (a.k.a. Beta Isreal; formerly known by the derogatory term "Falashas"). 2, 3, 4.5 This practiced was apparently discontinued some time ago. A pediatrician who works in the Beta Israel community claims that they no do not practice FGM in Israel. Also, their daughters who were born in Ethiopia were not mutilated. 6
FGM has spread to countries in or near Africa (e.g. Egypt) which are Muslim. But FGM is rare or nonexistent in many other Muslim countries. Examples are Iran, Jordan, Lebanon, Syria, and Turkey. Also, It is not done in the Maghreb countries of Northwest Africa. FGM is only occasionally found in Indonesia and other predominately Muslim countries in Asia."

Click here to read more

Another thing that bothers me is curfews... How many times do you see muslim wives complaining about their husbands who are out till 12:30, 1am playing cards, soccer, or just hanging with the guys.... If their wives were to hang out that late their husbands would object and remind her that men are different and therefore able to take care of themselves and stay out later. First of all, if you are in a marriage you cannot say that its ok for one person to do something but not the other. If the husband insists that he must play soccer at 10pm and will be home around 1am (typical of foreigners, especially arab men), or that hes going to his friends house for tea, then he needs to be flexible when it comes to his wife and allow her to stay out late with her friends. Obviously she shouldn't be out walking the streets at night, but if she is going to a girlfriends house the husband can drop her off and pick her up later. Most husbands will say that their wives dont care because they hang out with their friends while they are gone... WRONG!!!

Most husbands drop their wives off with the wives of their friends and go and play soccer or hang out leaving the wife no option but to sit with a group of strangers. I personally feel that if its a weeknight both the husband and wife should stay home together and go out on weekends if they feel the need to. However, if the husband is gone most of the time with his friends and putting them first, this is UNislamic and he needs to prioritize. So many men put their friends first and their families second.... They work, come home and eat, call their friends and leave to hang out with them. This is wrong and you are not fulfilling the rights of your wife. Friends are important but their needs to be a curfew. Staying out past 10pm is ridiculous. If you cant accomplish something before 10pm, what makes you think you will do it after 10pm? So many men wait until 9-10pm to go see their friends when they should be getting together with them earlier.


struggling said...

Very interesting to hear where the 40 days thing came from.
As for the cerfew issue, I see this all the time. Men who have just had babies go to work come home change and go out with their buddies until midnight on a weekday, leaving their wife at home or if she's "lucky" taking her with him, even though waking up every 3 hours makes her more than exhausted.

struggling said...

Sorry I just wamted to note it's not an arabic pratice to wait 40 to bathe/shower, it's in the Palestinian culture, as far as I know people in Syria do not practice this, as for other Arab countries I can't say forsure either way

Sacrifice4Allah said...

FGM is a despicable and completely haraam, practice! It has been outlawed in Egypt, it still occurs in Sudan and in some parts of Somalia.

Husbands/men who stay out until late, the more the wife and family tolerate it, the more the husband pushes the boundaries.